Good, but...

In French class, whenever we do any sort of speaking test there is a rubric that we're graded on. You can be rated anywhere from a 0-5 on a variety of criteria. If you score a 3.5-4 on something, that means you scored in the "good, but..." category. As mature as my class would like to think we are, there is still a fit of giggles everytime the teacher says "If you have a good, but.."  (Notice what it sounds like when the comma is removed...) Anyway, it basically means you did pretty well, but there are some things that could have been better. That's how my week went.

For starters, there were no meltdowns, breakdowns, freakouts, or anything of that sort. It's been a relatively happy week.. Some of the material that I was worried about and having trouble with seems to have gotten easier. I really  need (another) mapping, so everything on the hearing front hasn't been too great, which doesn't really help when you're put in one of the noisiest hearing environments.  It seems like the people at the school are starting to understand what I'm getting frustrated with, and are willing to help- as long as it doesn't involve spending, and a very misleading thing called "educational need" is shown.
Unfortunately:

• A) Sometimes when you've done everything you possibly can, there's nothing left but to try a proven and well-known technology. If this isn't recognized very soon, there can and will be action on our part.
• B) My intelligence and ability to study for hours just to learn the material I can't hear in class shows absolutely nothing about my hearing ability. I wish someone (who makes these decisions) would understand that.

Sorry if that's vague, it's probably best that I wait to share more details until after the fact.

Believe it or not, my week was relatively stress free. I haven't been completely overwhelmed, and actually got something that I oh-so-dearly was starting to miss- SLEEP! My teachers have scheduled all of the hardest tests on this upcoming Thursday, so I'm planning on getting a head start on studying so I'm not a complete disaster come Wednesday night.

And for the but.. And it's a big but... ( no pun intended... okay, maybe...)

I've had the same violin teacher ever since I started playing violin over three years ago. I'm not talking about my orchestra director, but my private lessons teacher who I've seen for  half an hour each week to work on any pieces or techniques that I have trouble with, or want to get better at. He's been my teacher when my hearing was getting worse, when I decided to get a CI, was waiting to get my implant activated, watched as I changed and grew along with my hearing, and then my journey with my second implant. He loved to experiment with how well I could hear differences in pitches, and was usually able to tell if an issue I was having with orchestra  was a "hearing thing" or just one of my own little quirks, completely unrelated to how well I can hear.

For the past two Mondays, he hadn't shown up at my school to give me a lesson during my orchestra class (or for any of his other students). I figured he was sick, and didn't really think anything of it. What I didn't know was that he hadn't called the orchestra director to let him know he wouldn't be there, which was something always did. My orchestra director was starting to get worried, and on Tuesday went over to my lesson teacher's apartment and knocked on the door, but no one answered. He soon found out no one had heard from him in a while, and called the police. The police came over to the apartmet, and found that my lesson teacher had passed away in his home at least a week ago. He was fairly young, and relatively healthy.

That's all I know, I have no clue about the cause was or any other details. I'm still very much in shock, and it has definitely made me appreciate each day for what it is, because you just never know if tomorrow will come. I know it won't be easy to find another teacher who understands and is nearly as interested in my hearing journey. I am very grateful for the three years that I had him, and can definitely say I wouldn't be where I am today without him.