This is part 2 in a series. If you haven't already done so, I recommend reading part 1before continuing.
I slowly got up and walked towards the interview room from my desk. An outspoken girl in my class shouted "good luck!" as I got up, but I assured her I had already interviewed and had no idea why I had to go back. I knew it wasn't to say I got in since they told us the list would not be posted for another month.
I hesitantly opened the door and peeked my head in the room. "Come in! Sit down!" they said. Well, they were being friendly... That seemed like a good sign...
Then, one of the teachers explained how during the course of the interviews that morning a girl in another class (who also has CI's) had brought in her FM and stated that the teachers needed to use it. This sparked the teacher's memory (who had visited our classroom before), and she made a comment along the lines of "Hey, last time I had to wear one of these things twice. I wonder if the other girl that used one also applied."
At this point, the girl being interviewed decided to be helpful, and said "Oh, yeah!" and then stated my full name.
This was one of those moments in which I mentally screamed "Really?! Was that really necessary?!"
I can't really blame anyone else, it really wasn't the girl's fault that she shared her knowledge... But I was still slightly annoyed. Anyway, there wasn't much time for me to get annoyed because one of the teachers continued.
"We were shocked... We had no idea, and you speak so well!"
Okay, this wasn't the first time I'd heard this...So far, so good...
"I can understand not wanting to be identified as the girl with hearing loss first," she continued, and told me about how she doesn't introduce her own daughter who has a chronic condition to people as "Jane, the girl with (disease)."
"But," she continued, "we have some concerns."
"Here it comes," I thought to myself, and I took a deep breath.
Look for part 3 tomorrow!
Showing posts with label disabilities. Show all posts
Showing posts with label disabilities. Show all posts
Wednesday, June 29, 2011
The Difference
Occasionally, people with little experience with hearing loss will make a hearing-related comment or ask a question that sounds absolutely ridiculous and stupid to someone who has dealt with hearing loss his or her entire life. It's easy to jump on these people, and write them off as ignorant of hearing loss and possibly even people with disabilities as a whole. What I've learned is that rather, it's how these people react after you try to educate them that demonstrates that they're either willing to learn and open-minded, or indeed ignorant. I've been putting off sharing these stories on my blog for a little while now, but they truly demonstrate the polar opposite reactions I've faced when trying to educate people about hearing loss. I'll split this up into a few posts- one story has a happy ending, the other with an unresolved and leaves-a-bad-taste-in-your-mouth feeling.
A while back I shared that I had gotten into a program at my school that's medically oriented with lots of hands on and observational experiences in medicine. It was a big deal to me because the program requires applying, getting recommendation letters, and an interview with the teachers of the class.
The interview required getting dressed up in formal business attire. Before the interview, I weighed the pros and cons of disclosing my hearing loss. While it seemed like it would be easier to be honest and upfront, I also didn't want deafness to be the topic of the entire interview, which would be short anyway. In addition, when people hear the word "deaf", it's easy for them to jump to conclusions based on their minimal experiences with other deaf people. Rather than focusing on my qualifications, I was afraid that their minds would instead start racing about the possibilities of things I *couldn't* do.
It was for those reasons I decided it would be best to wait until *after* I was accepted into the program to tell them about my CI's and hearing loss. My only concern was that one of the (two) teachers had visited with some students taking the class to tell us more about it a few months prior to the interview. She had been given the FM to wear, so I wasn't sure if she would remember that I was the one that gave it to her. I figured I'd take my chances, and if she said mentioned anything about it I would simply say that I used my FM to deal with noisier situations, but that I hear pretty well most of the time. It was true, and it seemed to be a good way to avoid talking about hearing too much.
So the interview came, and I got all dressed up and was so nervous. My sister (who took the class) told me not to shake their hands since one of them is a slight germaphobe, but someone else said it would be rude not to. Should I extend my hand, or just see if they extend theirs? What if I misheard their questions? What if I said something stupid?! In the end, they only asked me one question, and then spent a couple of minutes talking about my sister. At the end of the interview, the teachers told me "Your grades are great, you have outstanding recommendations and a flawless attendance record. I think we know everything we need to know!" and asked if I had any questions. I took that as a good sign (since those were the assets they listed as the most important to get into the program).
So I was relieved that I was done interviewing on the first day, since the teachers were there over a course of two days and some people wouldn't get interviewed until day 2. That night I had tons of homework and tests to study for. I barely got 4 hours of sleep, and I don't even think I had time to shower (that's not a regular occurrence, just fyi, haha!). That morning I was running late, so I pulled my frizzy hair into a messy bun, threw on an oversized T-shirt and jeans, and ran out the door without a touch of makeup on. I usually wear very little make up regularly, so it wasn't a really a huge deal except for the sunken in dark circles around my eyes. It was just one of those days where I looked (and felt) like hell!
With this mental image in your head, you can no doubt imagine the shock that came over my body when I arrived to medical science and the teachers came out and called my name and stated they "needed to talk to me." My heart and mind began racing. What could they possibly want?
To be continued...
A while back I shared that I had gotten into a program at my school that's medically oriented with lots of hands on and observational experiences in medicine. It was a big deal to me because the program requires applying, getting recommendation letters, and an interview with the teachers of the class.
The interview required getting dressed up in formal business attire. Before the interview, I weighed the pros and cons of disclosing my hearing loss. While it seemed like it would be easier to be honest and upfront, I also didn't want deafness to be the topic of the entire interview, which would be short anyway. In addition, when people hear the word "deaf", it's easy for them to jump to conclusions based on their minimal experiences with other deaf people. Rather than focusing on my qualifications, I was afraid that their minds would instead start racing about the possibilities of things I *couldn't* do.
It was for those reasons I decided it would be best to wait until *after* I was accepted into the program to tell them about my CI's and hearing loss. My only concern was that one of the (two) teachers had visited with some students taking the class to tell us more about it a few months prior to the interview. She had been given the FM to wear, so I wasn't sure if she would remember that I was the one that gave it to her. I figured I'd take my chances, and if she said mentioned anything about it I would simply say that I used my FM to deal with noisier situations, but that I hear pretty well most of the time. It was true, and it seemed to be a good way to avoid talking about hearing too much.
So the interview came, and I got all dressed up and was so nervous. My sister (who took the class) told me not to shake their hands since one of them is a slight germaphobe, but someone else said it would be rude not to. Should I extend my hand, or just see if they extend theirs? What if I misheard their questions? What if I said something stupid?! In the end, they only asked me one question, and then spent a couple of minutes talking about my sister. At the end of the interview, the teachers told me "Your grades are great, you have outstanding recommendations and a flawless attendance record. I think we know everything we need to know!" and asked if I had any questions. I took that as a good sign (since those were the assets they listed as the most important to get into the program).
So I was relieved that I was done interviewing on the first day, since the teachers were there over a course of two days and some people wouldn't get interviewed until day 2. That night I had tons of homework and tests to study for. I barely got 4 hours of sleep, and I don't even think I had time to shower (that's not a regular occurrence, just fyi, haha!). That morning I was running late, so I pulled my frizzy hair into a messy bun, threw on an oversized T-shirt and jeans, and ran out the door without a touch of makeup on. I usually wear very little make up regularly, so it wasn't a really a huge deal except for the sunken in dark circles around my eyes. It was just one of those days where I looked (and felt) like hell!
With this mental image in your head, you can no doubt imagine the shock that came over my body when I arrived to medical science and the teachers came out and called my name and stated they "needed to talk to me." My heart and mind began racing. What could they possibly want?
To be continued...
Thursday, October 7, 2010
Deaf teacher publicizes discrimination, gets suspended
So it just seems that there has been a lot of hearing loss/discrimination related new in my area lately. This article caught my eye when I was reading the newspaper this morning (Yes, I read the paper and always have. My friends like to make fun of me for doing so, but I'm always well informed!)
My summary: Kathleen Nosek is a deaf special ed teacher and has been teaching at the same school for ten years. In the past couple of years the principal of the school, Amy Miller, began insisting that Nosek administer pronunciation tests to her students herself. In the past Nosek had other teachers perform this test (which only had to be done a few times a year) for her, and it wasn't a problem. When Nosek told Miller that her hearing loss made it extremely difficult to accurately perform the tests, Miller questioned whether Nosek's hearing loss made her unfit for her job (which she's been doing for years just fine!). Well, Nosek chose to bring allegations of harassment and intimidation by Miller before the school board. The morning of, she had a local news reporter in her classroom and was interviewed. This led to her suspension.
The full story along with hundreds of comments is available here. If you ask me, this story is blatant discrimination, and her suspension is just the tip of the iceberg.
The news reporter published a blog post with a few clarifications and updates, available here.
My summary: Kathleen Nosek is a deaf special ed teacher and has been teaching at the same school for ten years. In the past couple of years the principal of the school, Amy Miller, began insisting that Nosek administer pronunciation tests to her students herself. In the past Nosek had other teachers perform this test (which only had to be done a few times a year) for her, and it wasn't a problem. When Nosek told Miller that her hearing loss made it extremely difficult to accurately perform the tests, Miller questioned whether Nosek's hearing loss made her unfit for her job (which she's been doing for years just fine!). Well, Nosek chose to bring allegations of harassment and intimidation by Miller before the school board. The morning of, she had a local news reporter in her classroom and was interviewed. This led to her suspension.
The full story along with hundreds of comments is available here. If you ask me, this story is blatant discrimination, and her suspension is just the tip of the iceberg.
The news reporter published a blog post with a few clarifications and updates, available here.
Friday, August 20, 2010
A long way to go
A few days ago, I was at a good friend's house with a group of girls. I'm close with some of them, but there were a couple who I was friends with when I was younger but haven't talked to very much in recent years. I was discussing how I was taking my driver's test the following day (which I passed, by the way! Yeah!) and how my parents were being even more paranoid than normal, since my sister had been hit by a car the week prior. I was describing how the girl driving hit her, and the mom came out and said it was their fault, but they did not get police involved since it was a minor accident in the parking lot. I mentioned how my sister decided not to ask for money for her car damage, since she didn't feel the scratch was very noticeable, and the girl driving the car also had special needs. A few days later, the mother called saying it was my sister's fault and asked for a very large sum of money for their car repairs. As I was relaying this story,
friend-who's-grown-apart (FWGA) chimed in:
FWGA: She had "special needs"? I didn't know 'they' could drive.
Close friend: I'm pretty sure that's discrimination if you say someone can't drive because of that.
FWGA: No! Because blind people aren't allowed to drive. Neither can deaf people...so I'm pretty sure they don't let 'them' drive.
Oy...While we've come a long way, we still have a long way to go! (And yes, I set her straight! It's just concerning that this conversation occurred right after I said I was taking my driving test.)
friend-who's-grown-apart (FWGA) chimed in:
FWGA: She had "special needs"? I didn't know 'they' could drive.
Close friend: I'm pretty sure that's discrimination if you say someone can't drive because of that.
FWGA: No! Because blind people aren't allowed to drive. Neither can deaf people...so I'm pretty sure they don't let 'them' drive.
Oy...While we've come a long way, we still have a long way to go! (And yes, I set her straight! It's just concerning that this conversation occurred right after I said I was taking my driving test.)
Friday, July 16, 2010
Comedy, Deafness, and Political Correctness
One thing that I've increasingly noticed on the internet is the argument of political correctness. Not only in terms of names used to describe people (hearing-impaired vs. deaf vs. hard-of-hearing), but also in terms of joking- what's okay, what isn't. I do think part of it is due to the fact that over the internet it's very hard to interpret tone of voice for tongue-in-cheek or sarcastic comments.
What really struck me is how widely opinions vary. Is it ever okay to make fun of a disability? Does having the disability give you the excuse to joke about it? Are these jokes ever even funny? A month or so back I was reading about Joan Rivers's new documentary, "Joan Rivers: A Piece of Work", and it briefly touched the subject. At one of her shows, Rivers made a Helen Keller joke (which, my deafness aside, I never really found them to be particularly funny. Can't say that I'm offended by them either), and a man in the audience was outraged, yelling at her that he has a deaf child and was offended by such a joke. "The comedian tears into him, informing him her mother was deaf and howling, 'Let me tell you what comedy is about — comedy is to make everybody laugh at everything and deal with it!’" - as quoted from this site.
Most of the time, I try to not take a defensive, sensitive standpoint. More often than not, people will say things that offend people out of pure lack off knowledge, not necessarily ignorance or out of intent to harm.I am not a big fan of stand up comedians. I do believe that it can be okay to laugh at our struggles, since they certainly aren't going to go away. Here is one joke I've heard a few times regarding hearing loss, and I do think it's funny in a cheesy humor sort of way.
A concerned husband went to the doctor to talk about his wife. He said to the doctor, “I think my wife is deaf because she never hears me the first time and always asks me to repeat things.”
“Well,” the doctor replied, “go home tonight, stand about 15 feet from her, and say something. If she doesn’t reply, move 5 feet closer and say it again. Keep doing this until we get an idea about the severity of her deafness.” The husband went home and did exactly as the doctor had instructed. He started off 15 feet from his wife in the kitchen as she was chopping some vegetables.
He said, “Honey, what’s for dinner?” He heard no response. He moved 5 feet closer and asked again. No reply. He moved 5 feet closer. Still no reply. He finally got fed up and moved right behind her, about an inch away, and asked again, “Honey, what’s for dinner?”
She replied, “For the fourth time, vegetable stew!” -Taken from Only Funny Jokes
As I've mentioned before, I'm Jewish. Living in Texas, people from time-to-time are shocked and as pretty strange questions. Sometimes people crack a little innocent joke, and I do sometimes find them funny. I think the key is knowing where the line between offensive and hilarious lies, and not overstepping it. (For those wondering, here is a little key of the difference between amusing and stupid. Jewish guilty mother jokes=funny. Big nose jokes= can go either way. Holocaust jokes= waaay overstepping the boundary.) When it comes to serious disabilities that I am not personally affected by, I would never dare make a joke about it. I don't think it's fair to joke when I haven't lived through the day-to-day struggles of a particular disease or disability.
I'd love to hear what everyone else thinks. Is there a time and place for these jokes? Do you think people can be too sensitive, or are others just being too ignorant?
What really struck me is how widely opinions vary. Is it ever okay to make fun of a disability? Does having the disability give you the excuse to joke about it? Are these jokes ever even funny? A month or so back I was reading about Joan Rivers's new documentary, "Joan Rivers: A Piece of Work", and it briefly touched the subject. At one of her shows, Rivers made a Helen Keller joke (which, my deafness aside, I never really found them to be particularly funny. Can't say that I'm offended by them either), and a man in the audience was outraged, yelling at her that he has a deaf child and was offended by such a joke. "The comedian tears into him, informing him her mother was deaf and howling, 'Let me tell you what comedy is about — comedy is to make everybody laugh at everything and deal with it!’" - as quoted from this site.
Most of the time, I try to not take a defensive, sensitive standpoint. More often than not, people will say things that offend people out of pure lack off knowledge, not necessarily ignorance or out of intent to harm.I am not a big fan of stand up comedians. I do believe that it can be okay to laugh at our struggles, since they certainly aren't going to go away. Here is one joke I've heard a few times regarding hearing loss, and I do think it's funny in a cheesy humor sort of way.
A concerned husband went to the doctor to talk about his wife. He said to the doctor, “I think my wife is deaf because she never hears me the first time and always asks me to repeat things.”
“Well,” the doctor replied, “go home tonight, stand about 15 feet from her, and say something. If she doesn’t reply, move 5 feet closer and say it again. Keep doing this until we get an idea about the severity of her deafness.” The husband went home and did exactly as the doctor had instructed. He started off 15 feet from his wife in the kitchen as she was chopping some vegetables.
He said, “Honey, what’s for dinner?” He heard no response. He moved 5 feet closer and asked again. No reply. He moved 5 feet closer. Still no reply. He finally got fed up and moved right behind her, about an inch away, and asked again, “Honey, what’s for dinner?”
She replied, “For the fourth time, vegetable stew!” -Taken from Only Funny Jokes
As I've mentioned before, I'm Jewish. Living in Texas, people from time-to-time are shocked and as pretty strange questions. Sometimes people crack a little innocent joke, and I do sometimes find them funny. I think the key is knowing where the line between offensive and hilarious lies, and not overstepping it. (For those wondering, here is a little key of the difference between amusing and stupid. Jewish guilty mother jokes=funny. Big nose jokes= can go either way. Holocaust jokes= waaay overstepping the boundary.) When it comes to serious disabilities that I am not personally affected by, I would never dare make a joke about it. I don't think it's fair to joke when I haven't lived through the day-to-day struggles of a particular disease or disability.
I'd love to hear what everyone else thinks. Is there a time and place for these jokes? Do you think people can be too sensitive, or are others just being too ignorant?
Friday, February 26, 2010
Perlman
I got very little sleep last night. In addition to having a huge test today, I went out last night. Where, you ask?
I couldn't agree more, Mr. Perlman. I couldn't agree more.
Why, to see the famous Itzhak Perlman!
At the moment you are either thinking "WOW!" or you have a very confused look on your face. That's okay. None of my friends knew who he was either
He's one of the best violinists EVER! He was born in Israel, but I believe he now lives in the US.You can read more about his accomplishments here.
It was amazing. I had to leave at the intermission because it was late, and I had to study. We had front-row (as in the VERY FIRST ROW) seats, which was pretty cool. Howevere, they were at the very right edge of the stage (where the Cello section of the orchestra sits) and the violinists sit toward the left area of the stage. If they dropped a cello, it would've landed on me :P. After the first song (out of 3) they moved him and I could only see his foot from the angle I was sitting. I could hear him great though, and put my left ear on my music program for even better enjoyment (I thought having it on both ears would be a bit too much) Anyway, it was really cool. Not only did he play really well, but he conducted the rest of the orchestra during the songs he played! How awesome is that?!
There's another thing about Mr. Perlman. It's not the first thing many people mention it when talking about him, since it's irrelevant to what makes him so amazing. As a child, he contracted polio and now must use either crutches or a wheelchair to get around. He used crutches at the performance I attended. He struggled to get on the platform which he had to perform on. After 5 minutes of him trying various methods of getting on the platform, and with the rest of the violin section looking quite nervous that he would fall, he made it in his seat. He turned to the audience, laughed, and gave a thumbs up.
I just love his attitude. He displays such intense emotion while he plays, you can see that he feels the music within.
I looked up some of his quotes, and stumbled upon this,
" Sometimes the wheelchairs don't arrive, the chairs are broken, or there's only one leg rest. There's an awful lot not being done. If we talk about it enough, someone will make it improve. "
I couldn't agree more, Mr. Perlman. I couldn't agree more.
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